Love & Scandal.

I have a really bad habit of comparing my love life (or any aspect of my life I see fit) to certain characters in shows I watch. If you don't watch Scandal [or haven't caught up, this contains spoilers, kind of]

I just finished watching the most recent episode of Scandal and I started thinking about how a lot of people I know (and myself) either strive to be one of the characters or end up being like them, unintentionally. Each character is played perfectly, and they're great at what they do, but all of their personal lives are fucked up.

President Fitz is the most powerful man in the world, supposedly, but ever since season one, he's lost. His marriage was over long before Olivia came into the picture, but divorce is not what the POTUS does, especially while he's in office, so he stays in this fruitless relationship for show. Then he meets someone who he genuinely loves [right person too late?]. Instead of making a decision, he is selfish [or tries to please everyone, depending on how you look at it] and they continue to pursue each other. He knows he needs to let her go, but he can't, at least not as of yet.
Olivia does her job, and she does it well. She's a powerhouse, and that's one of the reasons Fitz falls in loves with her, but she knew he was married and for awhile, she tried to fight it, but then she gave in to how she felt. Then she tries to do the right thing and stop it, but he's her weakness, her exception. She loves him, and you can tell she hates herself for it. She finally tells him that he needs to let her go.

Milly is the First Lady, and she's probably the worst of all. She knows about Olivia, but for the most part, she refuses to acknowledge that there's no love and no communication. She's more focused on her career anyways, and she seems to take pride in the fact that even though it's just on paper and mostly for show, she gets to call herself Mrs. Fitz. She dangles it in Olivia's face on occasion, but mostly, you can see the bitterness seeping out of her pores. She's the type of person who bullies people [passively or directly, depending on the person] into doing what she wants. She gets pregnant to not only put them ahead in the campaign, but to show Olivia what she could never have. She's the type of person who you'd probably hear say "If I can't have them, no one can".  She finally tells him "Her or Your Career/Reputation".

I know people who fall into these "categories" and it sucks. No one* wants to be the "Other Woman". Don't get me wrong, there are people who are and know they are, and say they don't mind, but I doubt that people strive to be settled for, or put on the back burner, or want to feel like they aren't good enough to be a priority. I also don't know of anyone who really wants to become the bitter, hateful bitch, that holds on to fragments of something past because they can't face the reality of the situation, that have to resort to blackmail and other things just to have someone. 

Lastly, no one chooses to fall in love with someone, at least not really. If you connect with someone, you connect with them. However, you can choose to pursue your connection, and that's choice those two made, knowing that there were other people involved who would have to live with the decisions they made. 

No one should have to settle, and if you're unhappy with something, make a choice to change it. It's my hopes that I never end up in a situation where I can become a Fitz, Olivia and definitely not a Milly. If I do, I hope I have the heart to make the right decision, even if it may not benefit me in the way I'd hope.

*there are some people who do enjoy being the other woman, enjoy knowing that they are part of ruining a family, household. I'm not saying they are completely at fault, because there was another party involved in making that decision, but I don't believe they started that way.